-{Sean pulling up in his car to a hooker-
Girl #5: Hey, honey.
Sean: S’up baby? Looking all smooth, standing on the corner at 3 in the morning and shit. You cold, baby? You want to use me as a blanket?
Girl #5: I’m just doing my thing.
Sean: Well, does doing your thing mean your tricky? ‘Cause I’d like to invest some of my hard earned money towards loving you, if you know what I getting at.
Girl #5: Well, how much you got, big man?
Sean: Well, I’m willing to drop 50 dollars on your ass, but there’s a condition going on.
Girl #5: What’s that?
Sean: You’re going to have to put those lucious lips of yours on… My… Slub-a-dub.
Girl #5: Ooh, I can do that.
Sean: You can?
Girl #5: Mm-hmm.
Sean: You mean, you ain’t going make fun of the fact that I called my gizza-gazza a “slub-a-dub”?
Girl #5: Honey you can call your thing what ever you want to as long as you got 50 bucks.
Sean: oh sna– well, alright then here’s the 50 dollars,-{unzips pants- and here’s my flip stick, now start wetting that thing up.
Girl #5:-{Opens his door- Sir, you are under arrest.
-{police car pulls up-
Sean: You got to be fucking with mind here.
Girl #5: No, I’m not.
Cop: Good job denise. We’ll take him from here.
-{Cop hand cuffs Sean-
Sean: what?!?! You going to arrest my ass for trying to get a ride on my slip ‘n’ slide? Fuck that shit.
Girl #5: Hey honey, when you get to jail, you’re going to be on the other end of a slip ‘n’ slide, and I hope you enjoy yourself.
Sean: wwwwhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattt?!?!?!
-{cop throws sean in back of police car-
Cop: Just get in the back, asshole.
Girl #5:-{from outside- You sick fuck.
Sean: Damn!!-{crying- This is a bunch of bullshit!!!
Peeper: Piss on me.-{also in the back of the police car-
Sean: what?!
Peeper: Please, piss me.
Sean: no!!!
Peeper: Just a tinkle.
Sean: fuck that, keep him away from me.
Peeper: Urine.
Sean: Keep this man away from me.
Adam Sandler – Cool Guy 5 Lyrics