Animaniacs – The Presidents Song (episode version) lyrics

[Yakko]
Heigh ho
Do you know
The names of the U.S. residents
Who then became the presidents
And got a view, from the White House loo
Of Pennsylvania Avenue?
[Wakko]
George WASHINGTON was the first, you see
He once chopped down a cherry tree
[Dot]
President number two would be
John ADAMS and then number three
[Yakko]
Tom JEFFERSON stayed up to write
A Declaration late at night
So he and his wife had a great big fight
And she made him sleep on the couch all night
[Wakko]
James MADISON never had a son
Then he fought the War of 1812
[Dot]
James MONROE’S colossal nose
Was bigger than Pinocchio’s
[Yakko]
John Quincy ADAMS was number six
And it’s Andrew JACKSON’S butt he kicks
So JACKSON learns to play politics
Next time he’s the one that the country picks
[Dot]
Martin VAN BUREN, number eight
For a one-term shot as chief of state
[Yakko]
William HARRISON, how do you praise?
That guy was dead in thirty days
[Wakko]
John TYLER, he liked country folk
[Dot]
And after him came President POLK
[Yakko]
Zachary TAYLOR liked to smoke
His breath k**ed friends whenever he spoke
[Wakko]
1850, really nifty
Millard FILLMORE’S in
[Yakko]
Young and fierce was Franklin PIERCE
The man without a chin
[Dot]
Follows next a period spannin’
Four long years with James BUCHANAN
Then the South starts shootin’ cannons
And we got a Civil War
[Unison]
A war, a war down south in Dixie
[Yakko]
Up to bat comes old Abe LINCOLN
[Dot]
There’s a guy who’s really thinkin’
[Wakko]
Kept the United States from shrinkin’
Saved the ship of state from sinkin’
[Dot]
Andrew JOHNSON’S next
He had some slight defects
[Wakko]
Congress each would impeach
[Dot]
And so the country now elects
[Yakko]
Ulysses Simpson GRANT
Who would scream and rave and rant
[Wakko]
While drinkin’ whiskey although risky
‘Cause he’d spill it on his pants
[Yakko]
It’s 1877
And the Democrats would gloat
But they’re all amazed when Rutherford HAYES
Wins by just one vote
[Dot]
James GARFIELD, someone really hated
‘Cause he was a**a**inated
[Wakko]
Chester ARTHUR gets instated
Four years later he was traded
[Dot]
For Grover CLEVELAND, really fat
Elected twice as a Democrat
Then Benjamin HARRISON; after that
It’s William MCKINLEY up to bat
[Yakko]
Teddy ROOSEVELT charged up San Juan Hill
[Wakko]
And President TAFT, he got the bill
[Yakko]
In 1913 Woodrow
[Unison]
WILSON takes us into World War I
[Yakko]
Warren HARDING; next in line
[Dot]
It’s Calvin COOLIDGE, he does fine
[Wakko]
And then in 1929
The market crashes and we find
[Yakko]
It’s Herbert HOOVER’S big debut
He gets the blame and loses to
[Dot]
Franklin ROOSEVELT, President who
Helped us win in World War II
[Wakko]
Harry TRUMAN, weird little human
Serves two terms and when he’s done
[Yakko]
It’s EISENHOWER who’s got the power
From ’53 to ’61
[Dot]
John KENNEDY had Camelot
Then Lyndon JOHNSON took his spot
[Yakko]
Richard NIXON, he gets caught
And Gerald FORD fell down a lot
[Wakko]
Jimmy CARTER liked campaign trips
[Yakko]
And Ronald REAGAN’S speeches’ scripts
All came from famous movie clips
And President BUSH said “Read my lips”
[Dot]
Now in Washington, DC
[Wakko]
There’s Democrats and the GOP
[Yakko]
But the ones in charge are plain to see
[Dot]
The CLINTONS, Bill and Hillary
[Yakko]
The next president to lead the way
Well, it might just be yourself one day
Then the press’ll distort everything you say
[Unison]
So jump in your plane and fly away

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