So someone said to me the other day Ive got a lisp
A stranger you know they said Ive got a subtle lisp and I should know I sound a little stupid doing spoken words when all my words have S in them are spoken so absurd
And Im not upset, okay it just s**s
You think youre speaking normally for two decades and then shucks;
Find out your stuff sounds like a stanza of Severus Snape’s toughest parseltounge is pronounced by Daffy Duck
So I will say this
My subtle lisp is not sinful. Im not sorry Saturday, Im not sorry Sunday; Im spiritual and when I speak I celebrate the Sabbath seven days a week
I’ve got special S sauce all smothered on my skull walls like a tossed salad so silk screen the Sistine ceiling on my soft pallet
I sing along with super scenesters reciting Sufjan Stevens songs in skinny jeans
Dance salsa with soccer moms sneaking out in skimpy see-through sarongs
I will answer your questions in stout with my s**y subtly lisping sparkling incisor small
Whats my surname? Watsky
Whats my size? Stocky
My city? San Francisco its so sweet now slow
See, Ive heard some steamy stories of oral s** but Im not stretching to say one time, I made a lady climax by speaking an S-y section of a Shakespeare sonnet in her split legs general direction
I scribble all S Essays I shred them and sprinkle the whole S ashes. My speech doesnt give a spotted sea snail if it pa**es. I slipped pa** straight Fs to straight Ss in my cla**es because my speech stay second semester senior status
Seriously so so so so soon, so sick sixth grade kids call me sofa king Im on tongue steroids, slammin with the Sammie Sosa swing, so tight I sleep upright in a small cell in Sing Sing and sail the seven seas on Steve Irwins sting ray while your speed boats sinking
Its still too soon
Anyway screw an S.O.S Im straight S.S.S for save someones standards. Studied at Emerson the school of savage speech
Sup Stanford?
I spit s**ier than Summer Sanders, Sarah Silverman, Susan Sarandon, Sissy Spacek, Sally Struthers, and Selena, spooning, in a 6-way same s** all S celebrity civil union
So, you can slander the gay lisp and I will slip you a solid list of friends, or 60% of Emerson; who, lisp or no lisp, will stop, spit, stay pissed, and start all over on the racists
You can save the South Korean stereotypes, the Sambo shtick, the s**ist sh** is sickening
And if you suppose your speech is normal, its cause your impediment is listening
Speak for those of us with something special. Something that sets us aside from my accent havers, my stammerers, my southerners, my st-st-stutterers, yes I will spit it sick and stick to never skipping S
Cause I was, s**ing on a soup spoon and I s**led it to sterling silver simple supple super soaker staying watching sister sister scenage syllables coming esophagus move up there this place is second place isolate oxygen theres no stopping this
I start this step of speaking you should see that I will not desist
Im sorry cause see, If you don’t like a subtle lisp, then you can simply s** on thissssssss